No matter where I go in this great country I continually
have one pet peeve which is consistent from sea to salty sea. No I am not
whining about fat cat politicians or just fat cats in general, it’s that I don’t
‘get’ why all the street names in
every city are named the same. Oh sure ‘Main’ is ok for a name and City
administrators like to prove they can count so I can see a First street up
through Three but after that, it’s high time to find unique and better names
for our dull mailbox-laden streets.
I am not sure why it is so hard to find memorable and
creative names for streets when all one has to do is crack the fridge for a slew
of good Nouns along with a bonus pungent whiff of overripe fruit. What bar-b-que
weekend warrior wouldn’t relish the
chance to live at the intersections of ‘Catsup and Mustard’, ‘Mayo and ‘Mato’ or
‘Chips n’ Salsa’? What’s wrong with changing a flat by ‘Monterey Jack’ and ‘Colby’
or navigating by nasal to the dump in-between ‘Limburger Lane’ and ‘Roquefort
Road.
Since we are all fired up about healthcare these days, why
not get the drug manufacturers in on the fun and let them pay royalties to
advertise their offerings. I think even if I sucked up plenty of Vitamin D and
calcium in a sunny city, I still would be comfortable with speed-walking at the
corner of ‘Boniva Boulevard and Osteoporosis’. I doubt if old dudes would have much trouble
populating a singles condo complex at ‘Via Viagra’ and ‘Cialis Court’ but I’m
not sure if the address would be popular with the macho college set.
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