Belt-free ‘Cell-u-lar”

I have always tried to embrace technology changes willingly as long as they don’t hang on my belt. As an old dog, for the most part, I think the ‘gee whiz’ tricks of the new fangled devices are generally more helpful to others than to me. I have been happy with smaller and cheaper computers as they have become ever more sophisticated, portable, and a help in my daily life. However, the 'do all' cell phone seems to be the big 'tech-Kahuna' as compared to computers for now. That is interesting considering the fact that unlike computers, phone service costs seem to be getting more expensive all the time? I just don't get the whole bluetooth permanent cellular phone attached to my head thing anyway. Though, by just saying the whole word “Cell-u-lar” instead of “Cell”, I think I have lost all ‘street-cred’ on this topic already?

Part of my problem is that I am sensitive now because most folks make fun of my old tiny Nokia cell phone. In its day, it was the best that TRACFONE had and I still like it because it fits INSIDE my pocket. Yes I said it, I am the one guy left that uses TracFone. It is not a great service, nor is it bad – it just does what I need it to do most of the time and that is be “ON”. It does receive text messages for free which is nifty, and honestly for an occasional user like me, it is a bargain at a tenth the monthly cost of a modern Smart phone. I know it doesn't forecast weather or translate Spanish, or tell me how to mix drinks, but it does have a built in flashlight and that's enough for me to see the light.

Now I have never found a great need to be on the phone at all times even when they were tethered to my desk. I do appreciate cell phones greatly and the feeling they provide of safety and security in emergencies. I remember always being frustrated to have to carry a pager and a pocket full of dimes, in search of the dying corner pay phone. I at least had moved to a pager WATCH which would have impressed Dick Tracy, but without pay phones, what was the point?

So what is the next big high tech thing that I must soon embrace? I will tell you right now, it had better not clip on my belt. No matter if it is a pager, cell, gps, or pedometer, if it is on my belt, I will catch it on stuff and it will break. I would rather they glue something to my elbows or stick a tracking device under my neck-fat like a dog, before add one more thing to my “bat-belt” of electronic accessories. Hmmm, maybe THAT’S IT! Maybe we should take the next ‘BIO logical’ step in the advancement of real CELLULAR phone technology at the blood level? I’m on board with the idea as long as when the phone rings, my foot won’t wag like a happy old dog getting his back scratched.