Revolving Resolutions

Though New Years already has enough alcoholic baggage with it to make it my least favorite holiday, the expectation of realistic resolutions always makes it feel like it comes with homework too! You mean I have to wish for world peace, bacon flavored Pop Tarts, and robot servants and really mean it? I thought they taught us in school that clichés will take care of all ills simply by ‘dreaming big’ or ‘standing strong’ to achieve anything right?

Clearly that’s why there is little motivation to be the first one out of the gate in a confetti-driven stupor to resolve to do much of anything other than get out of bed and scratch - which I am rather good at by the way. If only the world would truly revolve around football, food, and parades, then all of life’s toughest problems could be figured out and dealt with on every January 1^st.. That would leave the rest of the year left just to goof off and make / re-break the non-essential goals and impossible dreams that relentlessly recur and face us all in daily life.

Generally my resolutions fall into two categories – ideas that I am cursorily interested in but for only 5 minutes or less, and goals that I want to do for a lifetime but sadly will also do for less than 5 minutes as well. Oh sure every year I commit to ‘getting into shape’ but that’s NOT the type of resolution I should be making. The real mystery is whether my skin-sack's shape should resemble something akin to a tall n’ tan steak fry rather than the UH-oh-so familiar soft, ashen couch potato.

Honestly though, I don’t get melancholy over the relentless passage of time and the unfulfilled dreams of the previous year, since tomorrow’s literally a new day and change always happens. That is the one revolving constant that makes not just New Years, but ANY day just as good as any other for taking chances, making goals, and even missing marks. So for as many days as you keep on breathing, raise a glass, smile, and keep reaching for stars no matter how far away they may appear. Because I resolve one thing is certain – just like me, you’ll be making the same toast and jelly all over again - in just 364 and a quarter days!