Friday, February 26, 2016

Soap Dope

Ok, I admit it - I'm a 'soap-dropper'. I know it is a flaw and probably comes from 'gnatural' life' and inexperience at keeping clean. It is not that my hands are freakishly small or so silky smooth from lack of physical labor, it's just that slippery soap refuses to be tamed whenever I cry on it from the Dove-stuff left in my eyes while washing my face.

My mistake is I prefer 'bar' soap as opposed to those gelatinous slime squeeze bottles by everyone's sink. Who wants to touch a push pump tub covered in germs just to get at the antibacterial cleaning stuff supposedly hiding inside? That's like dipping a drinking water ladle into some sloppy Serengeti mud hole and expecting to bring up a purified Perrier spritzer to quench my thirst.

I could probably help my plight by simply switching to some of those fancy soaps with a little better tactile grip in the shape of butterflies, seashells, or snails. However I can't stand those creatures touching me in real life much less soapy ones rubbing up next to my vulnerable 'buck-nakey' hide in a dark prison shower. Why can't I get my bar soap with a slip-free velvet coating like you find on fancy gloves, steering wheel covers, or rough-housing rutting deer?

Soap is probably overrated anyway because at my age who am I trying to impress - the marketing departments of AARP and that Funeral Advantage outfit? They say clearly in their geezer-appeal ads 'I don't need a physical examination' to get buried so why die with a grease-free body and bleachy-clean undies? Since I'm as gray and wrinkly as a Botswana elephant anyway, maybe I should resort to warding off the flies just like they do - by 'packing MY dermis' in dust n' mud and leaving behind the bubbly suds. 


  1. Maybe you need one of those old soap-on-a-rope soaps. Then you could hang it around your neck and you'd always be prepared.

  2. Therefore, the first task while employing an Modifies his name divorce attorney is usually to establish the kind of scenario that you have. After you end which, find individuals who already went through a what you are under-going. Since the rate of which we divorce within the Oughout.Ersus.The. is approximately one-half , chances are you realize other people who have gone through a new divorce fit. Question them about their situation, that they utilized a good Modifies his name divorce attorney, and the way their particular attorney helped all of them.
    Divorce Lawyer Virginia
    This can be a time for it to keep your daily life, and look for the long term, with these guidelines, you are on the right path in order to undertaking just that. Choosing a great Modifies his name divorce attorney is definitely an essential making decisions course of action. Your professional individual preference use should be in control of getting as well as preserving your legal passions with your kids, your materials ownership, along with your salary. The truth is, holding onto a great Or divorce attorney also is a remarkably difficult task.