Thursday, May 19, 2011

High Fidelity Terminated

Hey I don’t care if you were or are a fan of California’s former Governator, 'Swarze-whatever' – aren’t you getting tired of these high profile losers and their lack of fidelity? Gee can’t anyone find Arnold a quality pair of lead-lined chastity lederhosen to contain his steroid-shrunk enthusiasm? I know she isn't Jewish, but if I were Swarzy’s wife and my hubby’s stereo-enhanced Hi Fi behaved this badly, I would have ALREADY had its amplitude modulated permanently!

Now I really could care less what kind of maiming the Terminator and his ‘full-of-themselves’ famous ilk do in their free time no matter how discourteous. But once one signs up for these top-shelf jobs working for the public and IN the public eye, you might want to remember not to SPIT in it at the same time. Oh I know it’s a lot to ask for just a whisper of decorum from a dumb hunk of Douglas Fir but remember you are supposed to be a ‘role model’ NOT a ‘roll with a model’!

It’s obvious those massive dark shades ‘Termy’ wears all the time aren’t working. It seems that the guy’s hypnotic red wandering eye has designs on just about anything that has big pixels. I have seen so many of Swarzenegger’s pixilated offspring this week that my vision is getting MORE blurry. No wonder the poor guy keeps trying to procreate – he just longs for children to focus on that actually have distinguishable facial features.

Oh sure we’re all indignant now but just wait until the dark forces of Skynet and James Cameron rear their ugly movie-heads with more Terminator sequels. The high-calling for pure hearts and ethical fidelity will both soon be forgotten. We will forgive Arnold’s granite jaw, lead head, and wooden speech to make him just as popular as ever, and indeed his stupid adoring fans WILL be back. Too bad though, it’s never that fickle-fun or easy for the toxic left-overs from yesterday’s meal. Despite Swarzenegger’s muscle-bound brain, the REAL heavy lifting in this apocalyptic mess, has been abruptly thrust upon yet another supposedly idyllic ‘public family’, and their TERMINATED remains.

12 comments:

  1. I think he should just star as himself in a biopic.

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  2. Ha ha! Love the photo, but it's the post that you are so right on about.

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  3. "roll with a model" - oh it gets so confusing. Now that we all know the news, the media would serve us better by just dropping it and moving on to more important news.

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  4. Arnie was the biggest hero in Austria since
    Mozart, and he sure Terminated that for them.

    Rough as you were with Arnold, I can't wait to hear you bash that former IMF chairman. He also
    lost his lustre -- but not his Lust!

    Hey, you've got it made! Lawless Celebrities
    could keep you in blog-material permanently.

    .

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  5. Unfortunately it's an old story that keeps repeating itself, but it's the wife and especially the kids who are the ones who end up suffering the most.

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  6. So now I know the dirt! They didn't say all of that in my People Magazine...hmmm the slackers! I'm just glad for the pajama monoblogs to keep me posted! A subscription I'll surely keep!

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  7. I'm glad to read this. Good for the men to say that this isn't what being a man is all about. It is narcissism, pure and simple. He's too important not to f0ck around. Cripes. And Shriver, coming form the Kennedy clan, is used to it. You get what you pay for, or tolerate.

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  8. Thanks for stopping by. You too have a flair with words. LOL Please don't make me laugh I just had stomach surgery, but every time I think about what you said I chuckle. Thanks again & have a great weekend.

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  9. It's too bad the Sperminator's little head is the one that does the thinking for him, eh?

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  10. Ha!! That picture! You are crazy. I loved this post and the way you spin words around. You have a gift! Douglas Fir Real!

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  11. Oh so that's why he was procreating! Loved the model comment.

    Thanks for stopping by and commenting. Hope you enjoy your summer with your college student. FYI, every time you go out, don't forget the TP!

    Megan

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