'High Five' things I miss about the oil spill

Actually there is nothing I really miss about the oil spill down in the Gulf. But in the interest of making lemon flavored water out of Lemonhead candy – uh well you get the point … I did assemble a list of the 5 things I will miss most about this front page story.After all, even in blogging, “you should never let a serious crisis go to waste” right? Although, after a scary 4 months, this news is older and riper than Homo Erectus and his petrified black banana.

COUNT 'EM DOWN FOLKS ...

FIVE ) I do love those big hotel and rental car discounts at the Gulf beaches. There is nothing like a stroll along a vacant white sand beach, alone with your thoughts, red temporary fencing, and a big ol' bag full of tar balls.

FOUR ) Oh how I will miss the last month of the President’s frequent open collar walks along the Gulf coastline, reflecting the concern of every average Joe and Joetta. Yeah closing airports, airspace, all boat traffic, and delaying thousands of workers from trying to contain the mess again and again is a double-darn dandy idea!

THREE ) Sadly I have to admit that I will miss myself, my equally naïve friends, and family all sitting around playing our favorite second-guessing game called “Just plug that hole”. Hey I use a garden hose all the time – I’m sure that oily 'ZIT' is no different a mile below sea level with 7000 pounds of pressure behind it right?

TWO ) Won’t we all miss those shots of turtles and sea birds experiencing a luxury oil dip treatment at the Gulf's BP spa? You could just see how relaxed they were after they got their final scrub down, wash and wax. I never thought about it before but for animals do they get a pedicure or a ‘critter-cure’?

And the number ONE thing I will miss from the Gulf oil spill is …

I may be an immature and juvenile ‘Slumdog’, but I’ll never get enough of listening to America’s first Indian Governor, Bobby Jindhal speak with a decidedly Louisianian accent. I mean I still have trouble with the locals here on how I say 'Missouri' (or MizzouRAH), yet this guy is apparently fueled by Gulf shrimp-water in his veins.

So there you have it. Give yourself a 'High Five' if you suffered stalwartly without skipping straight to number One. Hopefully the spigot stays shut, and the Gulf oil spill, along with this post, will soon be just a distant memory. Let's hope so,'cause the truth is folks, if it happens again, as far as funny goes - I'm tapped out.

Priorities NOT Politics

With Obama’s decision to not go to Arlington cemetery this Memorial day, I am more disappointed with the President’s priorities than I am interested in mocking his patriotism. Bush Sr. and Reagan missed the wreath ceremony at Arlington at least once in their presidencies (both were not on vacation however). It’s not that the President is resting on his laurels – we all understand he’s got a very busy job. But the point is that HE has chosen, THIS one weekend out of all the options available, to tour the oil ravaged Gulf spill rather than attend a few hours at Arlington.

While the oil in the Gulf of Mexico is a horrible tragedy, the fact remains that it was there yesterday and the 40 days before that, and it will be there tomorrow, and sadly, literally for years to come. The President apparently is willing to take precious time away from his Chicago family getaway to highlight political face-saving in the Gulf, yet sends surrogate Biden to play second fiddle at Arlington? I can’t understand leadership making this decision.

Memorial day is but ONE DAY per year. It is the day we remember our fallen – our nation’s purest heroes who have sacrificed literally EVERYTHING for liberty and the protection of our entire citizenry. While the Gulf mess is horrible, it will eventually be cleaned up and the region will return to something approaching ‘normal’. On the other hand, the precious lives of our ‘gone forever’ military service people and their families, WILL NEVER GO BACK TO NORMAL.

Should not any Chief Executive, make this one day - this one tiny, yet incredibly symbolic MEMORIAL day, THE MOST IMPORTANT priority of his administration? Given the world we face, all Americans need MORE understanding and respect for the true meaning of Memorial day not less. Special holidays aside, the President has roughly 350 other really nice days on the calendar to extol grand political gestures and appease regional voting blocks. But NO, not today of all days, as our national priority should be clear. Our nation’s leadership is duty bound to respect, honor and above all else … REMEMBER. Because this day SHOULD BE different; this day is SPECIAL – yes, today is Memorial day, our highest priority.

Chicago 101: Unethical politics

I had to chuckle at the news media today since they were aghast that the White House administration may have orchestrated an ‘un-paid’ job offer to Rep. Joe Sestak. This of course was to get him to bow out of his Pennsylvania democrat primary race, against the established crony, Sen. Arlen Specter. Wow is this really news? Aren’t almost all of the President’s top advisors based out of Chicago – America’s smoke-filled schoolyard for hard-ball politics? I love the area around the windy city, but honestly the back door deals and high level corruption in that town, are about as close as Al Capone’s scar was to his cigar.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not resigned to acceptance of this unethical turn of events; it is just that I am not surprised either. In fact, not just with this White House, but for MOST of the administrations before, I am probably more surprised that these creepy crawly, political hacks don’t get caught-up in their own tangled ethics webs more often. This stuff is so common now that even at the lowest levels of political thought, it sadly goes on all of the time.

When I was a younger, bright-eyed, and idealistically bushy tailed, I ran for a city council seat in a community of roughly 300,000 people. This was an un-paid position with the exception of a small meeting stipend and a city provided cell phone and fax machine (at a time both of those machines were REALLY unique). I was one of 5 candidates who ran for the seat and one of four of them who LOST! But here is where the fun begins, I was approached on numerous occasions with ‘advice’ to drop out of the race ‘for the good of the people I wanted to represent and myself’. Now don’t worry, it was not meant to be as dramatic as I make it sound. Basically the advice was geared toward the city and other ‘favored’ candidates preserving funds so as to not necessarily spend time and cash on the likes of little ol’ flies in the ointment like me. As for the benefit to myself, it was clear that a nice ‘commission’ appointment on the city planning board was probably a good fit for my experience and ambition if I left the race early.

As you might expect, I am rather granite-headed, so I did not take the deal and stayed in the race for the long haul, but unlike Rep. Sestak, lost handily. I was not blacklisted or threatened in any way for my defiance. In fact I did go on to OPENLY accept an unpaid Commissioner job on another City board to stay involved. But the moral is clear; these pushy wannabe Kingmakers infect ALL levels of government RIGHT NOW. They are like cockroaches so moral indignation will not kill them. They don’t care what we really think of them as long as we yield our will and personal power to their destructive selfish pressures.

If we want to improve ethics, then like in war, we have to stand-up and expose these rat nests early on and work our way up the food chain. Don’t cede power to the bullies and the political ‘handlers’ who make manipulation an ARTFORM. Most of us know what is ‘right and wrong’ so do IT and INSIST that your kids, family and local political representatives behave that way as well. Expose and embarrass the cheats, liars, and untrustworthy in your workplace, community, and yes, even your own family. Won’t it be wonderful someday if conniving, self-indulgent and unethical manipulators ARE really rare news? Sadly we may have to wait awhile until Chicago’s unseemly school of politics ‘hard-freezes’ over.

Obama-talk: Poker Face or Fisherman?

Yes I have been accused of being too verbose at times. I can get carried away with the best of them and will hang almost anything (except pictures), given enough rope. From personal experience however I’m also a lousy poker player. If I start chattering too long and too fast, I am usually subconsciously nervous, and REALLY trying too hard to fake a bluff or avoid revealing my hand. That’s why I’ll stick with fishing – you can talk all day, but in the end you either catch fish or you don’t. No doublespeak to get in the way and confuse the results.

Recently President Obama was asked a question that was fairly short and sweet. The crux of it was “Is it a wise decision to add more taxes to us with health care – aren’t we over-taxed as it is?” The President started strong with his defense of his policy and the reasons as he sees it to make the sacrifice. The problem was that he could not seem to stop talking. I am assuming that he just got a fresh set of Energizers before the press conference, because the Prez even astounded his own staff at his verbosity and the length of his rambling filibuster.

No I did not pull-up the transcript to confirm the word count or even time the exchange for that matter. But reportedly the Washington Post (web linked here) did the numbers and the President took some 2500 words and over 17 minutes to answer the single question? Wow, no wonder it takes so long to get stuff processed through the government bureaucracy. I had better remember that when I cut my head or need some of those top-shelf healthcare medical services in the future.

I know I am being a bit too picky. President Obama’s probably got a decent poker face and he’s not the first politician or last, to get his line tangled with dozens of others when fishing on a public pier. It’s just that in THIS case, if the public cannot understand the original legislation or its ‘benefits’ that have been forced upon them. Why can’t Obama or anyone else explain why we caught fish or didn’t concisely – doesn’t that send up a red flag warning? Oh- wait … please Mr. President, I don’t have the time for you to answer that. You see, I have to get back to work – since after taxes, my lunch HOUR is really only 17 minutes long!

Obama’s Not So Foreign-feeling Policy

I remember looking back to over a year ago to when President Obama was in the final throws of his campaign. “Change” was the word of the day and a seemingly endless parade of nations the world-over, were downright ‘giddy’ at the prospects for a ‘New and Improved’ US foreign policy (whatever that meant?). Well its 2010 and the same old actors are STILL seething with contempt for the U.S. and its way of life. Oddly, with all of our President’s perceived charm offensive, we have even added a few new global grumps like Israel – and they used to actually like us?

Now honestly, unlike the President and some of his ‘super-fans’ I am not surprised by the world’s lack of attitude change or adulation. Except for handing the keys to Whitehouse and the Presidential limo, the world will ALWAYS complain about America’s foreign policy because, to put it bluntly, they’re JEALOUS.

Oh boy, now I have done it. Talk about the arrogance – who would make such unfair recriminations against the motive’s of other the countries of the world? Shouldn’t America consider the ‘feelings’ of all – not just its own people? Well as warm and cuddly as that all sounds and ‘feels’ the answer is a resounding ‘NO!’ and the President’s foreign policy team would serve themselves better if they understand why.

You can never make everyone happy. For many nations, their foreign policy objectives are exactly polar opposites of our own so there is no need to apologize or complain. Our nation should simply follow OUR best path which best fits OUR long term goals. This would equate to China’s recent frustration with U.S. arm sales to Taiwan. Obviously China someday wants to absorb Taiwan back into mainland China. It is counter to the United State’s best interests for this to happen and therefore we ‘risk confrontation’ with China but maintain our principles and relationship with Taiwan.

Policy decisions like this may seem to provoke China or other nations who disagree with America’s overseas objectives, however I think it is FAR BETTER to set clear principles for both allies and enemies and act accordingly.It's kind of like a RATIONAL parent when you were a child. You knew if you set your toys on fire there would be BAD consequences. You weren’t quite exactly sure what ‘BAD’ meant really, to your personal health and freedom, but you were smart enough NOT to light a match to find out. In other words, your parent’s reputation preceded them. You did not always understand the intimate details of their reward/punishment plan, but for the big stuff – you knew where the line was and in a funny way – that was comforting. Our friends and enemies don't have to always 'love' our methods BUT if they can consistently understand them, then foreign policy STABILITY is almost as helpful.

America’s foreign policy by definition should be of unapologetic motive to benefit AMERICANS! Why is this so hard for not only our own people to grasp, but for everyone else outside the borders as well? I think it is noble for nations to cooperate and come together in principle on how to behave. However, at the end of the day, the truth is, that it’s ‘every man (or nation) for himself’. Yes, I know you are recoiling at my abrupt cave-man grunt, devoid of convolution (oh great – its back again …). The point is that America can have high goals and ambitions which INCLUDE other nations. However, our foreign policy team should NEVER FORGET that our nation’s desires must always come FIRST. Yes, the United States makes errors in foreign policy decisions from time to time just like EVERY political entity has done since the beginning of time. But the difference is you don’t see other nations constantly falling over backwards apologizing, rejecting their nationalism, and putting off long term interests to quell the temporary criticism.

So I continue to be hopeful too that ‘Change’ is still on the horizon for Obama’s foreign policy. But my hope will NOT BE for more world cooperation and self-flagellation but conversely it will be for more SELF-RESPECT and blatant SELF-INTEREST. America is the strongest, richest and most generous nation on earth and we should not be ashamed or apologetic of our heritage of success. It’s understandable that the world is jealous – and it is America’s job to ensure they CONTINUE to feel that way!

A Band-Aid for Healthcare

I have not spent a bunch of time rallying either for or against the healthcare debate, mostly because what I say or think will not make one iota of difference anyway. So why get a full head of steam built up when there is no train on the track? Did I just channel Will Rogers? No, probably not since there are no steam trains on tracks any longer, ergo the analogy just does not make any sense?

Well that is EXACTLY how I feel about this healthcare bill as written. At 2800 pages long, it is just too much for anyone to get their proverbial arms around, much less actually digest. It confounds me as to what the big attraction is in this bill that makes grown politicians throw caution to the wind along with their potentially long political careers just to cram all of this through RIGHT NOW? Doesn’t that make anyone else just a little bit curious and NERVOUS? Just what flavor of Kool-aid are these folks drinking?

Now I completely understand the President’s reluctance in throwing the WHOLE bill out and starting over. Even if I were naïve enough to believe that Congress really will put the interests of the people FIRST (THIS TIME) over their individual party agendas, I personally don’t think another year of debate will change much? It’s clear that both sides are more interested in gaining a political advantage over each other than solving the basic issues and that drives the public crazy. We know these people are wasting our time, money and worse yet they SUPPOSEDLY work for us? The reality though is that this is AMERICA, not Europe and MOST Americans are not interested in giving up their world-class healthcare availability to emulate inadequate socialized medicine models despite the President's good intentions.

In general I’ll admit it! I am stupid and impatient when it comes to reams of legal descriptions, covenants, and provisions on just about ANYTHING. So why not make it easy on me and anyone like me when these guys go to write a ‘GOOD’ healthcare bill? Quit trying to be all things to all people and bankrupting the system in the process. Take things slow – test a couple of ideas and fine tune the balance to get the BEST answer rather than any old answer. My happy band-aid fix for healthcare is to simply split it up into small parts and let the light of day expose the TRUTH on whatever it is that is being pushed upon us.

If Congress is sincere and they truly can come together on sensible provisions for health plan portability or the elimination of pre-existing condition cut-offs; then VOTE on those pieces now. Put off the provisions that cause the Unions to go nuts, the insurance companies to fight, and the rest of us not to trust anybody that sets foot in Washington.

In the end the REAL problem with healthcare access is ALL cost driven – not features! If you get rid of the obscene LIABILITY exposure for Doctors, Hospitals, medical equipment and drug manufacturers, then you will be a step closer to a workable solution. The government could set strictly DEFINED limited liability schedules and enforce them. No more multi-million dollar judgments for a severed toe or similar misfortune. People would still be protected adequately from abuse or malpractice, but no more re-distribution of wealth in the hundreds of millions to a few lawyers at the expense of the many.

Congress need not concentrate on EXTENDING access if it focuses on driving down COSTS including legal liabilities. As costs lower, and real market-driven solutions take hold, the ideal of increased access and universal coverage will soon become closer to a reality. Will Rogers DID say “People’s minds are changed through observation and not through argument“ so quit bickering over thousands of pages of ‘gotchas’ and legal ‘twists’ for special interest groups. Divide the legislation up into easy-to-understand and small digestible chunks and give them an Up or Down vote. Remember It’s the U.S. taxpayer who is footing the bill, so please try using a band-aid FIRST to fix healthcare BEFORE subjecting all Americans to a Socialist European 'BODY CAST'!

Obama bets Yuengling not Bud on hockey

I don’t know about you but my first reaction when I heard the President made his Olympic bet with Canada was “Wow the Chinese are even covering the U.S. bar bets these days?” I know Archie Bunker was more interested in political correctness than I am, but I thought I‘d better check out this special brew pronounced “YING-LING” before passing judgment. I honestly don’t have anything against foreign breweries, but geez do we have to choose one that sounds like it came from the “Baby Names for Giant Pandas” book?

I was quickly relieved to visit Yuengling’s website and find the familiar eagle that we have come to recognize as American’s lager … uh now wait a minute, I thought Budweiser had an eagle behind THEIR logo? Well I guess a fancy regal eagle is not something you can copyright? Apparently Yuengling is not only an American brewery, but the OLDEST American brewery based in the historic backyard of our founding fathers – Pennsylvania. In some alternate space time “worm-holey” kind of way, Ben Franklin himself is probably raising a glass right now and belching “U – S – A” with fervor!

Unlike the now Belgian and Brazilian owned Budweiser brand, Yuengling is an ALL-AMERICAN hold-out proudly started by German immigrants over 180 years ago. The German name means “Young Man” in English which though void of bruising machismo, is marginally better than “Kinderling” – or ‘children man’; likely Michael Jackson’s first choice German name for Jesus juice?

So with no big-time international cash to fund national distribution networks and the lawyers to fight off much larger breweries, I guess Yuengling stuck to Philly and the Eastern U.S.? Obama could not have had the pleasure of a frosty tall mug of Yuengling in Chicago, or anywhere else in the Midwest, so he must have acquired his preference for the brew during his tenure in D.C.?

This got me thinking as to what I might put up as a suitable offering if I was in command of D.C's big leather chair? Those little powdered tubs of Crystal Light lemonade seem to be too chintzy and diet Dr. Thunder Wal Mart soda is an acquired taste at best. So just to mix things up a bit, I think I would offer up a few bottles of Holland’s “ChocoVine” wine. Only the Dutch in a clog-induced Amsterdam fog could conceive of a commercial pairing of gluten-free chocolate & red wine. Oh sure we have ALL talked about it, but who would really do such a thing – Yum ???

So Congrats are in order for the Canadian hockey team. I won’t hold a grudge but lets just say, good old Idaho russets are replacing Yukon Gold taters in this household for awhile. I hope the Prime Minister enjoys his case of Yuengling even if he thinks it came from a Chinese Panda. He’d be wrong of course … Obama’s all American, Monsieur - uh well half Kenyan .. uh … umm – He’s the President ok and he's definately not a stinking Panda?! Ju...just take your hockey beer and Mountie hat and get back on your side of the Great lakes EH!