Adult Diapers – Duty Calls

Can we talk privately for a minute? What would you do if you HAD to wear an adult diaper? No don’t worry, that LAST piece of my Missouri dignity still seems to be intact, unless of course I eat too much roadkill stew. It’s just that today I had to take leave of my ‘blog-droppings’ to RETURN some super DOOper, Depends adult ‘diapies’ to a Target store, and it got me thinking.

I know I know, it is a bad idea when I start to think, but believe me when you have to stand in front of a cash register lady and sheepishly hand over not one, but TWO packs of ‘panty hampers’ you’ll be trying to think, OF ANYTHING ELSE too! Couldn’t the stupid things be colorless white like normal underwear, rather than powder blue and pale pink WITH FLOWERS. I’m telling you, anytime I have been around diapers in the past, I may have been thinking I was in a field, but it was definitely NOT filled with fragrant flowers.

This whole thing started because of my wife’s air race adventure a couple of weeks ago. You might recall that originally she was scheduled to fly a very slow aircraft more than 2400 statute miles across the country. As a precaution, the crew decided to carry these ‘load-bearing bloomers’ rather than risk a mid-air explosion.

As luck would have it (for the pilots) the slow plane was replaced at the last minute with a very fast aircraft. I guess that karma caught up with me too, since inexplicably my duty became to dump the empty undies back at the store. Yes, I’ve been promoted from the race team’s dedicated ‘blogmaster’, to the adult diaper delivery boy, all in one day. Oh goody, the BOTTOM must be getting really close now!