The problem with choice

Don’t worry there is no controversial point and counterpoint to be made here. Now, terms like ‘choice’ and ‘gay’ have been pirated into highly charged political doublespeak. But sadly for me, I’m not that hip or deep so some would call me a ‘square’ I guess. But geometry terms aside, as my Daddy used to say, “I don’t care what they call me as long as they call me for dinner.”

So for dinner, I went to a fast food joint today where you park your car in a stall and order your food from the car. Eventually the food is delivered by somebody on skates (preferably a girl – remember I’m antiquated). The problem with this is that even though I know what I want and can point to it on the car-side menu, the person taking the order can only hear me, and therefore CAN’T SEE what I want. This place has about 10 types of burritos. They have numbers for each burrito but that is for a combination meal and I just wanted a basic burrito with beans, jalepenos and veggies alone.

When the order came, of course it was wrong and was just a plain bean burrito. I checked the receipt and it WAS what I ordered but NOT what I wanted. When did the world decide that it was better to have 50 choices of stuff to muddle up the possibility of getting the ONE CHOICE I DO WANT? Even when I have guests now, I am careful to serve regular AND decaf coffee with the choice of 1% milk or almondine hazelnut Half and Half creamer. Did we really go to all this trouble 20 years ago just to assuage EVERY individual taste? As I recall when I was young, you got a choice of having coffee with grounds in the bottom of the cup or NOT having coffee at all.

Even shredded wheat has been perverted by choice. What on earth is more plain, dry, and simple than a brick of shredded wheat? Now the family might request shredded wheat in the blueberry, maple, strawberry, chocolate or cinnamon streusel frosted varieties. If that is not confusing enough, consider then that the product also comes as plain shredded, bite-sized little squares, or full- sized big double squares. Gee it’s no wonder I’m so geometrically challenged and stressed with all of these ‘square’ choices in my life – it’s enough to kill my good mood and make me really ‘UN-GAY’.