Saturday, June 26, 2010

A Toast To Truckers

I was driving around today doing some errands and I came across a local soda bottling plant that bills itself as the ‘Billion Bubble Company’ or something like that. I also noticed that hunkered up to the dock bay at the billion bubble company was a giant 18 wheeler tagged as a load of ‘Carbon Dioxide’. So if the building has a billion in it, how many bubbles do you think might be in that big truck?

So I wonder what it is like essentially being a truck driver for stuff that people ‘Burp’ all day long. In fact what is it like to truck any of that oddball inexpensive stuff that nobody thinks about? I gotta believe that there is probably a trucking hierarchy for such things mandated by a 100 page long union contract. For job protection, the old timer truckers probably get the Kleenix shipments since every place you go, there are at least ten different pastel colored boxes of this stuff. In fact in grade school now, every parent is expected to send 3 boxes with the kid and the ten-ply puffy moisturized ones are priced like gold.

The truckers that have been around a few years, well they get the paper towels. Those are mostly just used in kitchens and as napkins at BBQ joints so not as popular as ‘nose tissue’ but pretty universal still. All the greenhorn truckers get the toilet paper loads. Yeah everyone uses the stuff, but nobody really wants to admit to it much less haul it around. For most things and people in life, you gotta believe that things will end up ‘OK’, but NOPE not for toilet paper. Everyone knows that there is no future there because when the END is near, you are heading for the sewer - no doubt about it.

So here’s a toast to the truckers who move all those bubbles , rags, and seemingly worthless stuff that all of us use every day. Tonight after a big pig-rib dinner, wipe your saucy face, then smile for a nameless trucker. Blow your nose and snort a laugh or two for our cowboys of the open road. And don’t forget to raise a glass of bubbles, and bellow a belch for freedom to our tanned and hairy diesel heroes. You’ll have to move around for an hour or so and wait before you’ll be able to offer up your final trucker salute. But remember, all good things are worth the wait, so you are just going to have to ‘Grin and Bear it’!

1 comment:

  1. I'd like truckers better if they'd stop driving
    ten feet behind me at speeds it would take them a hundred feet to stop. I think the realization that they have the power to scare car-drivers to death relieves them of having to run over them.
    I think everything we use should be made in the places we live. Then the roads would only be terrorized by normal psychos in smaller vehicles.